Isolated deep in a rugged and dense forest, I was lost in my own thoughts as I meandered through a narrow winding trail. The jagged and rough terrain wasn't easy to traverse as I made my way through the ups and downs of rolling hills.
It was time to escape civilization, permanently. As I scouted the land for a location on which to build my new home, I stumbled upon an abandoned quarry deep in the middle of nowhere. There were tools and equipment in working order, but it was evident the quarry hadn't been used in many years. I would make use of it to build my new home.
Not far from the quarry, I found a rugged hill with a steep slope on which I could build my home. I set up camp, and began constructing the foundation. I used the quarry to mine blocks, and block by block, I began building a new home.
~~~~~~~~~~
Years later and exhausted from the restless construction, my home was now complete and I was living in it. The structure had become a fortified home that resembled a small castle, surrounded by an impenetrable wall. No one was getting in without great difficulty, if at all.
Alone and isolated, I was perfectly content with my reclusive life. Now in my 40s, I was done dreaming and fantasizing about a reality that would never come to fruition. Years of my life had been wasted waiting around for the right cats and water fairies to come into my life, but I had come to realize that was nothing more than a fairy tale and a pipe dream.
Just a dream. Just a dream. Just a dream.
Those fantastical dreams had only stirred up hatred and contempt in the villages. Their petty and pathetic false rumors. I'm a predator. I'm cold and dangerous. Whatever. Let them label and ostracize and ban and think what they will. To hell with them and their hate or complacency.
No one could be trusted, not even family. Who knew what side they were truly on. Even if they were coerced, they still complied knowing the intended affect was one of harm, and in my eyes, this is equivalent to compromise. I don't compromise on connection. All trust had been permanently destroyed, and it wasn't coming back. The door had been slammed shut long ago at this point, and no one would be let in.
Numerous childish attempts over the years had been made to provoke me into some sort of reaction. Despising drama, I would have no part in it. I couldn't care less about what sort of chaos was ensuing out in the world. My peace would forever be fortified and no one would be let in... ever.
My life in the villages had been nothing but one of misunderstandings and disdain for my mere existence. If I wasn't even allowed to love who I wanted, why would I want to be a part of that world?
I would let no one in. Not even if they came knocking.
~~~~~~~~~~
Having been alone in my thoughts all day, the decision had been made. Outside, it started to rain and I could hear the pitter-patter of rain falling against the vaulted stained glass windows in my gothic dining room.
I had waited all my life for something that wasn't arriving. I went into the kitchen and began cooking my "Side-eye Soup".